MOSEY OF THE MONTH - Babbacombe Model Village
This may surprise you, but I’m not the biggest dog in the world. That’s Digby, of course. I’m what you might be tempted to call tastefully modest in my proportions. Or, if you’re in the mood for a growl and a hard stare, a bit of a titch. Go on, just try it. Alright, that’s enough. 

When one of my humans suggested a visit to a model village, my first thought was that I was being invited along on a trip to where Gigi Hadid, Naomi Campbell and Cara Delevingnivingnivingne (I think you’ll find that’s how she spells it) all live. 

I took a dim view of the old fool’s suggestion. You’re a married man, I told him. Besides - Harry Styles, you’re most definitely not. Harry Secombe, more like. You can imagine my surprise when I was told what a model village actually is, which is basically a Toto-sized version of the world. 

If you’re similarly pocket-sized, you’ll be sick of getting a crane in the neck every time you look at something taller than Miles Finch off Elf. If you’ve always thought to yourself: the Statue of Liberty’s alright as far as it goes but it’s a bit big innit, get yourself over to Babbacombe Model Village, my little friend. I’ve never seen such mini-marvels. 

It’s dog-friendly, by which I mean they love dogs - well, what’s not to love? - and they don’t charge extra for us. Good job, I don’t carry cash and I’m always losing my Barklaycard. 

It’s in Torquay, which is a great place for a stroll - yes, I’m a big fan of a Torquay Walkie - and not as far from lovely Sidders as you might think. Mind you, my sense of distance is shot. While we were there I travelled to Stonehenge and London in a few seconds, so I’m all confused now. 

‘MUSEMENT OF THE MONTH - Stick Man
What’s brown and sticky? A stick, of course. And we’ve got just the stick for you. For a stick you can really get stuck into, try the all-natural Stick Man that my shop’s currently selling. 

It’s not a real stick - you have to bring your own bark. It’s made from tough suede and jute and, with super-strong stitching, it’s the stick you can give some real stick. It doesn’t give up like some toys, That’s right - it’s got stickability. And the price isn’t a sticking point. 

MERCHANT OF THE MONTH - The Marine
Now, those of you who know me will know that I’m smarter than the average dog. And not just when I wear my tweed bow tie. I’m a fan of fact, a trivia type, a knowledge nabber - in short, I live to quiz. So, I love taking part in the best in the quizness bizness, on Wednesday at the Marine. 7.30, and free to enter. See you there. Just don’t get into an argument with me over the right answer. I can be dogmatic. 

MUNCH OF THE MONTH – Antlers
I’m chewsy about chews. That’s why I always like an antler. They’re not deer. Sorry, they are deer, but they’re not dear. Stag-geringly tasty too. 

MENTION OF THE MONTH – New book!
This is a new section in which I give a woof out to somebody doing something remarkable. This month, it’s concerning a fab little chap appearing in his first book, out for publication in April. 

It’s a terrific read, set in lovely Sidders, featuring an irresistibly charming and handsome you can’t help but love. Who is it? Ooh, glad you ask. It’s me, and my brand new book is on sale from April. More next month. And every month thereafter, I shouldn’t wonder. 

Toto out.